I hope everyone forgotten my blog.

I sincerely hope most people forgot this old-ass blog.
I just need somewhere to rant. I feel so low that i can't feel anything anymore.

Life has been hectic like crazy and i kinda forgot how it feels like to just do nothing without having the nagging voice at the back of your head constantly reminding you of the piles of work you need to do.

Statistics test on monday and my whole saturday has been unproductive.
I completely have no motivation and feel like d-y-i-n-g.

I've been sitting at the same spot from 1 till now, 7 hours of unproductivity doing nothing, in angst and agony because i can't go out do anything fun.

I'm just mad. Mad and tired of everything, everyone. I feel like the world is spinning to fast for me to catch up. I've spent 17years trying to pick up the pace and catch up but i think its finally dawning on me that i can never catch up, and i'm getting old. and Tired. Very tired.
I wished countless times for more hours in a day..

I can't feel anyone anymore. The ones who are suppose to be closest to me seem the furthest. I think i've lost sight of whats important to me.

I can't feel your heartbeat.
I can't feel your heartbeat.
I can't feel your heartbeat.
I can't feel your heartbeat.
I can't feel your heartbeat.

But i think i just felt my heartbreak.

I guess i'm suffering from a life crisis at 17. I feel damn old.
My priorities are constantly shifting and i feel like i need that constant feeling of anxiety to push me to do work.

Maybe its because after all my hard work for my project some jackass screwed everything up and i think i'm gna do quite badly.

I don't know why but i feel isolated from the world these days. From you.
Maybe i'm in denial. So much denial till i've tuned myself out and shut myself out.