twenty twelve

Hello.

It's been two years since my blog post. Pity, it's two years lost and I can't remember what I did. Writing has always been my outlet, it gave me ventilation. I wonder why I stopped. hmm.

Read through my old entries and couldn't help laughing. I've changed so much, yet I'm still the same person. Sortof, kind of, mostly the same ..

I still remember that I was bawling my eyes out the day before poly life started, whimpering to the Boy about how miserable I was, and how the Boy comforted + lecturered me at the same time about growing up and being independent.

Three years has passed, and I'm unofficially graduated from Ngee Ann. It really feels surreal, I felt that going to school everyday was redundant and I was reluctant to get out of bed every morning. Psychology wasn't my first choice, even now I don't particularly hate it or love it. But I'm just grateful for the friends I made. I never would have imagine that I would meet people so similar to me, who care so much about me and knew me better than I ever knew myself.

What made me me love Ngee Ann so much, was all the fond memories we shared together. I treasure the moments we shared, when we were talking about how crappy life was with assignments that continuously came and never seemed to end. I laughed at all the childish fights we had together, even though it made me cry in the past. I loved how carefree we were, living life with no inhibitions. I just enjoyed being young, being free.

It wasn't all fun at the beginning. Being thrown, totally unprepared. Having no idea how to do the bloody assignments and having no idea what I was studying. Endlessly questioning myself why I was studying retarded modules that I would never apply in real life. And then there was internship, the first time I ever felt so alone. But I'm thankful for the friends who stood by me these three years. Despite what seemed like endless torture and misery, I did learn new things.

But its over, we all have to start a new chapter of our lives. And this damn repetitive cycle is gonna start again, uncertainties, anxieties and loneliness. Growing up is inevitable, so I just I'll just have to suck it up and step outside my comfort zone again.

And no, I still don't know how to read minds after studying Psychology for three years.

2012.

Twenty twelve has been good to me so far, ignoring the fact that its only the second month into the year. I've had my fair share of ups and downs, and enough drama to last me through the year. At least all these drama has made me and the Boy realize that we're still madly in love with each other, and that anyone else's opinions doesn't matter.

Recounting the events from first to third February, it was so dramatic and kinda made me laugh a little. But oh well, what's life without a little bit of drama? At least we made fond memories that we could laugh about ten years down the road.

It was the best surprise birthday I've ever had, and I'm forever grateful to you for organizing it Love. Thank you for making it such a great birthday, but I was just happy being able to spend my our 3rd year anniversary together.

Nonetheless, thank you everyone for coming and surprising me too. There were so many surprises that day, I'm thankful I didn't have a heart attack or something.

Lesson learnt, I'm no good with surprises, and I'm bad at looking surprised because everyone questioned if I was really surprised, even though I clearly was.

Thank you, for always being there for me.